11 things we learnt from moving cities
In February of this year, my husband Emile and I moved to Canberra from Hobart, Tasmania. I started a job in communications and Emile transferred within his company (lucky!). It's been about 7 months since then so I thought I'd share what we've learnt so far from starting life in a new city.
It’s hard making friends, unless you put yourself out there
Making friends in a new city isn’t easy, especially when you’ve lived in the same city for most of your life. The only way to meet people is to get out of your comfort zone and say ‘yes’. Meet someone through work that you get along with? Ask them to coffee! Join a sporting club, organise a gathering with your new neighbours, stop to chat to them when you’re taking out the garbage, say yes when your colleagues are going out after work… It doesn’t take a lot of effort, but it does take time. I can’t say that we’ve made close good friends yet, but we’re both slowly fostering relationships with the people around us one by one.
Downsizing can be liberating
When we moved to Canberra, we had already decided that we wanted to live in an apartment close to the city so that we can enjoy our new surroundings. This meant that we consciously culled all our stuff before we moved, knowing that we’d most likely be living in a smaller apartment. I can’t tell you how liberating this felt for both of us. Even though we kept most of our furniture (which was only a year old), we got rid of all the junk and unnecessary household items, clothes, ‘memories’ from when we were kids etc. It was honestly the best feeling. We moved into a one-bedroom apartment as planned and are absolutely loving a life that’s more minimalist and less complicated.
Nothing is easy to start off with
Having grown up in Hobart, everything was always familiar. You really take that for granted when you move to a new city – I’ve had to find a new hairdresser, use Google maps for just about everything, figure out our favourite local hang-outs (in progress), … there’s also a whole lot of the irreplaceable aspects when you move away from ‘home’, but soon enough you find your groove, things become easier and you find new unique aspects of the place you live.
You become stronger as a couple
Emile and I were pretty ready for this adventure and have ticked a whole lot of boxes since getting married last year. But I think moving was the biggest one. We both needed a fresh start in our careers, personal lives and in establishing our independence. It was the first big life decision we’ve made together (apart from deciding to get married) and it feels awesome – tackling life goals!
You learn to embrace being a tourist in your own city
I’m still warming to this, but Canberra has so many cool nooks and crannies to explore – spectacular museums, food scenes, wineries, festivals… I haven’t even scratched the surface. It’s exciting, because there’s always something new to do. Now that the weather is getting warmer, we’re keen to take the bicycles out and explore the city. When you take a weekend to do that, it can actually feel like a mini holiday.
You leave your comfort zone a lot
Like I said, nothing comes easy. For me, I’ve made a change in my career – or rather, pursued my career in communications more fully. This has come with a whole lot of instances where I’ve had to step up and leave my comfort zone. It’s the same with moving into a smaller apartment, making new friends, joining a sporting club, doing things you wouldn’t normally do. But moving cities really brings that spirit out in you, because you’re constantly pushing your personal boundaries, you get used to that feeling really quickly.
If the opportunities don’t come to you, you can just leave and go get the opportunity yourself
A big reason for why we moved to Canberra was for work. Tasmania can be a small place, and I was finding it particularly hard to find work in the field that I studied, which was Marketing & Communications. After I finished uni, I was jobless for a few months, until I found an administration job in events, which I did for two years. I was always keeping an eye out for other opportunities, but there was just no work for new grads in little old Hobart. It truly was the push we needed to get out and go find the opportunities ourselves and get a fresh start in our mid twenties.
Finding comfort in family, and also establishing boundaries
We’ve moved closer to family with Emile’s parents and siblings all living in Canberra, and mine in Sydney (3 hours away). We were the last ones left in Tasmania! Being closer to family has been such a blessing and made life so much easier. You’ve always got someone to turn to when you need a hand or just a good honest chat. We’re both really blessed that we are good friends with parents and siblings, and family time for us is a joy. However, being closer to family has also meant that there’s the comfort zone trap to fall into. We’re newly married, so we’ve been conscious of maintaining our independence that we established by living alone Hobart for a year. Not seeing our family as frequently as we can has kept the times we do spend together extra special.
Moving can be the key to a healthier and happier lifestyle
Getting out of the rut of your same old routine and establishing a new life in a new city can be just the thing you need to kick some health goals. Starting a full-time job, getting into a serious relationship, and then marriage all in the space of 3 years (oh, and major ankle surgery) really took its toll on my body and lifestyle. 8 kilos later, something big had to change. Moving to Canberra really gave me the push that I needed to get my health back on track. It’s been a good year so far after I joined a swimming club, both of us buying a bicycle and being much happier in our jobs.
Staying in touch takes planning, effort and time – and also not!
Keeping in touch with your old friends can be really tough. You actually need to carve time out to see each other and make the effort to keep up with each other’s lives. I’ve planned a girls’ weekend with my old housemates in the coming weeks, which we’ve had planned for almost 3 months. But then again, it doesn’t need to be that hard. Just make the effort to make a phone call every now and then! Once you do, and end up having a nice long chat, you’ll feel much better and think how darn easy it was! Line up a time during your lunch break or a quiet Sunday afternoon – as if you’re catching up for coffee or something…this is something I have to keep reminding myself of.
You will miss home
There was a period of time recently that I was super home-sick. I missed Tassie so so much. I missed our friends and church, the ease of life, the beautiful mountain, knowing our favourite bars and restaurants, and even the local grocery store. Life was good. When you’re missing home, you only remember the really good parts of that place, which are still really good, no doubt. My father-in-law swears by this rule, and that is to return back there and see how you feel. You’ll feel wonderful going back, but at the end of your trip, you’ll feel just the same as every other day that you lived there. My recent visit taught be that. At the end of the trip, I felt like Canberra was now my home and being with my husband and family is what ‘home’ is to me, no matter where I live.
Have you moved cities or even countries before? How do you feel about it now? What did you find most challenging? I'd love to know!
